Trump’s UFC Pick for White House Brawl Makes Wild Admission

Trump’s UFC Pick for White House Brawl Makes Wild Admission

Donald Trump’s 80th birthday UFC extravaganza has been touted by one of its star players as a helpful “distraction” from the troubles the president himself created for Americans.

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The UFC’s all-time knockout leader, Derrick Lewis, described the upcoming event as a much-needed respite.

“The country needs something like this,” he told The Wall Street Journal. “We can distract the American people from all that’s going on,” Lewis, 41, said.

Lewis, who was added to Sunday’s fight card at Trump’s request, is facing fellow heavyweight Josh Hokit in the fourth of seven fights scheduled to take place at the gaudy new addition to the White House’s South Lawn dubbed ‘the Claw’ on Sunday evening.

The fights are expected to take place in the midst of a heat wave and a possible thunderstorm, and possibly in the presence of a preponderance of pests.

Trump’s octogenarian birthday party comes as many Americans are struggling to grapple with the rising cost of living, and are blaming his administration for it.

The cost of a mortgage, gas, food and goods have all gone up, with inflation rising across the board. The Consumer Price Index rose 4.2 percent year on year, hitting a three-year high.

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When asked about the increase on Wednesday, Trump offered a startling response.

“I love the inflation,” he told reporters in the Oval Office. “You know why? Because as soon as this war is over … when the war is over, it’s coming down, it’s going to come down like a rock.”

The president launched the war in Iran without approval from Congress in February. Despite a tentative ceasefire in April, it has now dragged on for well over three months, increasing the cost of oil and pushing up gas prices exponentially.

But Trump has shown no interest in the financial impact of his war on Americans, saying he didn’t think about it at all as he negotiated with Iran.

Voters, however, have been thinking about it, and the polls reflect how deeply unpopular Trump’s handling of Iran and the economy have become.

Lewis predicted that the UFC event will be a glowing success.

“I’m happy to be part of American history,” he said. “This is one of the events they’ll be talking about 100 years from now.”

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